（ the desperation in the boy's tone makes his brain itch in a way he doesn't like, too much like the begging he's already witnessed once. ）

Oh, I experienced it. But my memory's shot, so it's not all up here. （ he taps a finger against his temple, meaning — well, exactly what he means. ） I guess you could argue that means it doesn't get counted as bankable liveable time if I don't remember every minute.

（ he doesn't really care one way or another. it's just time. it's stretched out behind him in a long path, and it's longer ahead. it's taken him a long, long while not to despair about it, that boundless horizon of days, and days, and days. ）