Well, （ it's said around a mouthful of cake. god, he is so gross and obnoxious. this is the man you told your sad life story to, sasuke? this bitch??? please love yourself. ） I didn't really have any plans.

（ clearly, that has changed. ）

But hey, this hot ass twunk I'm dating insisted on being stupidly thoughtful on a fertility festival holiday I was kiiiiiinda thinking about just fucking him until we're both so dehydrated we need to learn how to breathe underwater to recoup ourselves. I don't know, maybe I'll ask him.

（ the fork is held aloft again, and he closes his mouth over it, slides backwards while making very clear eye contact. ）

Wanna fuck the day away, ma petite flamme?