（ his gaze drops to his hands, where he'd kept wearing the ring even after james died. it didn't come with him, and sometimes he forgets which finger he wore it on now.
but just about anyone he stays with for the entirety of their life has to know about the immortality sooner or later. some of them leave afterwards, not able to stand it for reasons he's always accepted with relative grace. some stay until the end. james did. ）
Like I said, illegal. But we went through the motions together. I lived with him until he died, which was — just before it became legal where we lived at the time, actually. But I've been 'married' in one cultural context or another, to a lot of people over the centuries, men, women, people who identify as neither or both.
[Another unbelievable piece of information unearthed from Cy's mind, his experiences of the world, ancient and all-encompassing. Sasuke falls quiet; he doesn't know how exactly to articulate what hearing that makes him feel.
A sting of jealousy—less toward all of Cy's marriages across time, and more for the fact that the marriage itself as described, for love of a person, is such an unattainable thing. He has already considered it. Back in Konoha, chained to tradition as well as the need to build his clan or risk losing it forever, it is a fact he will need to face. There are only so many options. Perhaps leaving was a method to push it off, selfishly.]
I see.
[His ability to communicate his feelings on this subject is woefully unready.]
（ he loved a boy named naruto, he said. and relationships between men simply weren't done.
cy reaches out and takes his wrist, pulls the mostly-untouched miso from his hands and sets it aside. lets his fingers collar the fine bones there, thumb against the jump of his pulse. ）
We don't have to think about it. What's your opinion on shortcake? Do they have that in Shinobiland?
[In the cage of that hand, Sasuke's fingers flex, a little like a trapped bird. Grateful to move away from the topic, but also conscious of how easily his mind gets stuck on holes of dark thought.]
I know cake, but I've never heard of that. [Is it short?] I don't really like sweet things. Do you?
[That earns an eye roll, but at least it's good-natured. You ridiculous man.]
I'll try it for you.
[At this juncture, there's very little he wouldn't try for Cyram. He's a totally normal, healthy individual who isn't furiously imprinting on the first hot man with trauma who is nice to him, what do you mean?]
（ cy laughs at that expression, calling one of the little barely-bite-sized cakes into his hand. it's a soft, delicate filigree of cream overlaid on a green base — matcha, which he'd chosen on a whim. it isn't sweet, or at least not as sweet as some of the other options. but for a kid who isn't big on sugar, it might still be too much.
cy holds it up between them, fingers posed at its base so it's posed alluringly aloft. both eyebrows are raised in something half invitation and half challenge — the tomato gently ushered in between his lips wasn't too terribly long ago, and he's showing a remarkable proclivity for adventure and adaptation. now it's just a question of whether or not he'll respond to the implication. ）
[As accustomed as he's becoming to Cy's casual use of transmatting, he doesn't so much as blink this time at the sudden appearance of the small, sponge-like cake. Then it is lifted up to his lips, a clear indication—as the tomato was fed between his teeth, so seems to be what Cy is coaxing now.
Bite-sized and delicate, it's still a decent mouthful. Sasuke is someone who eats his food slowly, carefully, picking with the spare attention of one prone to losing their appetite. But he won't turn down this challenge, not when it's Cy—not as charged as this feels, the tickle of soft cream at his lips. That sugary scent in his nose.
Lips part, taking all of it from Cy's fingers with an obedience that is accompanied by direct eye contact. It's a stretch just to fit the dessert into his mouth at once, jaw clenching down, thoroughly beginning to chew. A dollop of cream is chased from Cy's thumb with a quick, pink tongue.]
（ that eye contact makes one corner of his mouth quirk up, appreciative of both the view and the attempt, and the little baby steps into an attempt at something seductive and playful is absolutely not lost on him. when sasuke laps at his thumb, he pushes it forward in pursuit, rubbing against his bottom lip. ）
You're gonna look so fucking hot sucking dick.
（ there's a little thrum of fond praise in how he says it. the way someone would speak about a masterpiece, half-finished but taking shape. seeing the promise of future beauty in the vague shape of stone. ）
[He's imagined it, since Cy performed the act for him—branded now into his memory with real and visceral permanency. And every time the thought has come into his head since, it was always Cy whose knees he sank between. Always Cy who steadied him with hands in his hair, dark and filthy words in his ear. What does he taste like? What would it feel like? The hunger is like fire in his belly, warming straight through to an ache of arousal.
Swallowing, throat working around the shortcake—and though he tastes it, a muted kind of sweetness with the matcha—he's more interested in the flavor salt on Cy's thumb against his lower lip.]
For the record, if there's ever anything you want to try, we can do it. There's a few things I'm not super fond of, but I don't mind doing for instructional purposes or interest. Whether you wanna top or bottom, or try Domming or subbing, sweetheart, I am open to possibility. My body is your playground, go wild.
[The way his traumatized little Grinch heart grows every time Cy calls him sweetheart. He's never going to get used to it.]
What don't you like?
[The idea of practicing something Cy wouldn't be into is—unappealing, but he doesn't know what would even make that list. Cy's experience is so expansive.]
Well, not a big fan of being pissed on. Or crapped on, I've held way too many babies to make that erotic literally at all.
（ the least normal way of saying 'no scat or watersports' actually. ）
I don't get anything out of someone trying to humiliate me during sex. Not really into like, animal roleplay. Garden variety pet play is kinda 'eh'. I'm not gonna take somebody out for walkies on a leash while they bark like a dog, but I respect their desire to play out that kink. Rimming — tongue in someone's ass basically — is hit or miss based on personal hygiene. If I'm gonna do that one I usually make a point of having a sexy mutual scrub down in the shower first so everybody's nice and provably tidy.
（ he gives it a moment's consideration, then: ）
Some people are into DDLG/LB stuff, which is short for 'Daddy Dom/Little Girl or Boy'. That's where there's often a component of infantilization, or age regression, and a focus on a kinda parental style caretaking. It can be sexual but isn't always. Not really into that either. It's not a trigger — something that upsets me, something traumatic, me or weirds me out as an FYI — it just doesn't turn me on, either. I guess most of the things I don't really care for are tied in some way to someone acting outside themselves somehow, assuming a completely different persona or changing significantly from how they present normally. Like, one of the things in the BDSM community is that you step carefully so you're not shaming anyone for a kink — because a lot of them come from trauma or experiences that people are trying to work through — and they're a hundred percent valid for that reason, but it's not for me.
（ a bit of a laugh. ）
I guess just don't piss on me or slap me and call me a pussy during sex, or express an urge to use a litter box and eat tuna off a plate and we're probably fine for the most part. Oh, and while I meant what I said about like, Every Kink Is Valid — fuck the weirdos who want to take their kinks out to like a public park, even if it's just like... wheeling your slave in a gimp suit around on a wagon or something. Involving other people in your kink without consent is a big ol' fucking nope from me. Kink shit stays in kink space, and I will fight god about that one.
[Having only recently been exposed to the concept of kinks, not to mention that he may possess some of his own—dubious, questionable, though normalized/accepted by Cy—he listens, grasping for some comprehension. He is grateful that Cy explains as he goes, even as the sexually explicit images stack up in his mind to a towering height of unimaginable crudity.
Sincerely, Sasuke did not know sex could be so complex.
"Gimp suit"? He will not pursue that one.]
... I don't know that I would be interested in any of that. [A blowjob is the most sexually deviant act he has considered recently, next to the actual "sex" he would like to have with Cy, someday. And the toys Cy had gifted him? So, so lewd. Downright obscene.] Some of it sounds unsanitary. But no, I...
[Hm.]
I wouldn't want to expose myself like that publicly either. [He can hardly imagine holding someone's hand in visible line of sight.] How did anyone come up with these things?
（ he reaches for another little piece of celery off the crudités plate, chewing on it as he speaks: ）
I don't have a problem with public sex. I actually do monitoring in a dungeon — kink dungeon, not the other kind — back home, which basically means that I make sure things are safe and above board for the participants. I've had some good fun running free use scenes, for instance — setting a sub up to be used by other men or women while I oversee it. But that's still behind kinda-closed doors, you know?
（ but while they're on the topic he should probably say more about what he does like. ）
By the way — no pressure on my likes either. I know you're getting the hang of that by now, so I won't keep harping on it, but for my own peace of mind — happy to float these ideas your way, and never do them if they don't appeal to you. （ given the gravity of what they discussed not too long ago, he's sure sasuke will get why the extra step of clarity exists. ） I like doing things like spankings, flogging, general impact play. Getting someone so worked over they can't sit down after is pretty fucking nice — but the aftercare is absolutely critical there and I wouldn't ever scene without it. Knife play's a harder sell, needs a lot of trust on both sides. Tying people up, blindfolding them, edging, orgasm denial, all that kinda stuff. Fucking love using sex toys on a partner, which you might've figured out by now. Getting people to beg is... ah.
（ he shakes his head just a bit, and makes a breathy exhalation of sound. ）
Well, let's just say it turns my crank. Whether part of the scene is that they're begging me to stop but not safewording out, or they're begging me to — I don't know, fuck them, fill them, come inside them, let them come, it doesn't really matter to me. All forms equally welcome. But if you don't wanna get into any of that yet, or ever, that's fine too. Straight up vanilla sex is also pretty great, and I already know I'm gonna want to fuck you a thousand different ways without ever breaking out a set of fuzzy handcuffs, so the rest is up to you.
[He cannot possibly listen to Cy describe what he enjoys and remain unaffected. Where the previous descriptions had shriveled some of that interest, now it's renewed, stoked by the drawling cadence of Cy's voice. The variety is difficult for his mind to grasp onto specificity—but listening to those words, appended at the end by such a bold statement of intent, is enough.
The rush of arousal is hot, vivid. Sitting on the blanket, Sasuke is aware of the sudden pulse between his own folded thighs, cock stirring, attention dovetailing from the meal altogether. He is aware that he wants... all of that, or at least he wants to try it. Pain, knives, obedience and control. Even the humiliating thought of begging. Under Cy's hands, anything feels possible—at least in that moment, in the blasé and confident way it's intoned.]
Cyram.
[Low and almost petulant, he hesitates on how to approach this sudden predicament of tunnel-visioned lust. His face is undeniably red.]
（ wow he is watching a sexual awakening in real time. sasuke's face darkens with colour, and cy just grins at him, and then leans into his space and noses at his cheek. drops a kiss, soft and sure, against one corner of his mouth. ）
[That's what you get for essentially dirty talking him.]
I don't care. [In a show of surprising initiative and physicality, this time Sasuke turns his head, seeking a full kiss, needy with the seal of hard pressure over Cy's mouth.] Your room is larger, but mine is cleaner.
[What about the food? ... The birds can eat it, for all he cares in that moment.]
（ well, the press of sasuke's mouth over his means the laugh that'd been on his lips gets swallowed down. he does kiss back, tasting the strawberries of only minutes ago. ）
We can do yours. I know you're a fastidious little bitch.
（ that word could be an insult from anyone else. from cy, it just sounds like sweetheart in another tongue. ）
Let me drop the food off — there's a place that takes donations for the low rank scrubs like us — and then I'll meet you there? Any particular thing on the list strike your fancy? Because if you're itching for me to stick anything up your ass I'm gonna send you back to your room to get yourself ready while I get the food sitch sorted.
[It's more difficult, in this addled state of arousal that is swiftly steering an articulate mind out of reach, to communicate. Yet he tries—it is important to, and there's a ribbon of determination in him knotting tightly, because he wants this. He wants to express that he wants this, and to overcome what had halted him last time.
The crass words don't feel like an insult, only livening another little flutter of interest in his stomach.]
Yes, I want to try it again. With your fingers and with the toy.
[Maybe he is getting ahead of himself—but the barrier of fear has eased, partly because Cy's treatment of him has not changed since that failed attempt. That foundation of reassurance has held.]
[Sasuke exhales a harsh breath through his nose, but otherwise outwardly schools his reaction, except for how his right hand fists over a thigh, knuckles whitening. His right eye is very dark—his left that eerie lilac half-covered by a fringe of hair.]
（ what is this 'unfortunately', that's like an early birthday or a late christmas gift to him, thanks. and there's no denying it stirs arousal in him, too — sir has always hit just a little harder than it maybe should. ）
Oh, he learns so quick.
（ he doesn't need to touch him to teleport him, but he does it anyway, leaning in and pressing another kiss to his mouth. ）
Remember to keep your eyes closed.
（ he warned him once, and not without reason. the void isn't exactly the safest place for humans. but now, he's confident enough that sasuke will obey him, and in a brief glimmer of that awful energy, he yeets the kid back to his room.
from there, it's just packing up the food. mindless busy work, done without really thinking about it, all his focus and attention already primed on sasuke. he's pretty sure the kid would have stripped down to nothing and all but jumped on the dildo the way he was all fired up there — but there's a warm, soft, certain confidence there too, that he'd be respectful enough of cy's preferences, temperament and triggers to have given himself a bit of grace about it, too. to have gone just slow enough as youthful impatience allows.
and he is thinking about it, still, when he transmats over to the food bank, and drops off the remainder of the platter — having carefully sorted out what was touched versus what was untouched. he chats a bit with the person tending the window, an easy, playful sort of conversation that comes so naturally to him, that's intended to build up sasuke's impatience with the time it's taking him to get there.
then it's a quick jaunt back to his room to grab that blanket still wrapped in its gift bag (which, for some ungodly reason, has a dick on it. really? at a store for bedding?) before he transmats into sasuke's small space. ）
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
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You married a man?
[The concept itself has broken his brain in half, he can no longer follow the original thread of his thought.]
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right. ）
Yeah.
（ his gaze drops to his hands, where he'd kept wearing the ring even after james died. it didn't come with him, and sometimes he forgets which finger he wore it on now.
but just about anyone he stays with for the entirety of their life has to know about the immortality sooner or later. some of them leave afterwards, not able to stand it for reasons he's always accepted with relative grace. some stay until the end. james did. ）
Like I said, illegal. But we went through the motions together. I lived with him until he died, which was — just before it became legal where we lived at the time, actually. But I've been 'married' in one cultural context or another, to a lot of people over the centuries, men, women, people who identify as neither or both.
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A sting of jealousy—less toward all of Cy's marriages across time, and more for the fact that the marriage itself as described, for love of a person, is such an unattainable thing. He has already considered it. Back in Konoha, chained to tradition as well as the need to build his clan or risk losing it forever, it is a fact he will need to face. There are only so many options. Perhaps leaving was a method to push it off, selfishly.]
I see.
[His ability to communicate his feelings on this subject is woefully unready.]
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cy reaches out and takes his wrist, pulls the mostly-untouched miso from his hands and sets it aside. lets his fingers collar the fine bones there, thumb against the jump of his pulse. ）
We don't have to think about it. What's your opinion on shortcake? Do they have that in Shinobiland?
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I know cake, but I've never heard of that. [Is it short?] I don't really like sweet things. Do you?
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（ he'd melt in a rainstorm, obviously. ）
But yeah. Like, not exclusively, but once in a while it's nice to have. Wanna try a piece?
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I'll try it for you.
[At this juncture, there's very little he wouldn't try for Cyram. He's a totally normal, healthy individual who isn't furiously imprinting on the first hot man with trauma who is nice to him, what do you mean?]
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cy holds it up between them, fingers posed at its base so it's posed alluringly aloft. both eyebrows are raised in something half invitation and half challenge — the tomato gently ushered in between his lips wasn't too terribly long ago, and he's showing a remarkable proclivity for adventure and adaptation. now it's just a question of whether or not he'll respond to the implication. ）
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Bite-sized and delicate, it's still a decent mouthful. Sasuke is someone who eats his food slowly, carefully, picking with the spare attention of one prone to losing their appetite. But he won't turn down this challenge, not when it's Cy—not as charged as this feels, the tickle of soft cream at his lips. That sugary scent in his nose.
Lips part, taking all of it from Cy's fingers with an obedience that is accompanied by direct eye contact. It's a stretch just to fit the dessert into his mouth at once, jaw clenching down, thoroughly beginning to chew. A dollop of cream is chased from Cy's thumb with a quick, pink tongue.]
no subject
You're gonna look so fucking hot sucking dick.
（ there's a little thrum of fond praise in how he says it. the way someone would speak about a masterpiece, half-finished but taking shape. seeing the promise of future beauty in the vague shape of stone. ）
Do you want to learn?
no subject
Swallowing, throat working around the shortcake—and though he tastes it, a muted kind of sweetness with the matcha—he's more interested in the flavor salt on Cy's thumb against his lower lip.]
Yes. Can we try?
no subject
（ like he's going to say NO? ）
For the record, if there's ever anything you want to try, we can do it. There's a few things I'm not super fond of, but I don't mind doing for instructional purposes or interest. Whether you wanna top or bottom, or try Domming or subbing, sweetheart, I am open to possibility. My body is your playground, go wild.
no subject
What don't you like?
[The idea of practicing something Cy wouldn't be into is—unappealing, but he doesn't know what would even make that list. Cy's experience is so expansive.]
no subject
（ the least normal way of saying 'no scat or watersports' actually. ）
I don't get anything out of someone trying to humiliate me during sex. Not really into like, animal roleplay. Garden variety pet play is kinda 'eh'. I'm not gonna take somebody out for walkies on a leash while they bark like a dog, but I respect their desire to play out that kink. Rimming — tongue in someone's ass basically — is hit or miss based on personal hygiene. If I'm gonna do that one I usually make a point of having a sexy mutual scrub down in the shower first so everybody's nice and provably tidy.
（ he gives it a moment's consideration, then: ）
Some people are into DDLG/LB stuff, which is short for 'Daddy Dom/Little Girl or Boy'. That's where there's often a component of infantilization, or age regression, and a focus on a kinda parental style caretaking. It can be sexual but isn't always. Not really into that either. It's not a trigger — something that upsets me, something traumatic, me or weirds me out as an FYI — it just doesn't turn me on, either. I guess most of the things I don't really care for are tied in some way to someone acting outside themselves somehow, assuming a completely different persona or changing significantly from how they present normally. Like, one of the things in the BDSM community is that you step carefully so you're not shaming anyone for a kink — because a lot of them come from trauma or experiences that people are trying to work through — and they're a hundred percent valid for that reason, but it's not for me.
（ a bit of a laugh. ）
I guess just don't piss on me or slap me and call me a pussy during sex, or express an urge to use a litter box and eat tuna off a plate and we're probably fine for the most part. Oh, and while I meant what I said about like, Every Kink Is Valid — fuck the weirdos who want to take their kinks out to like a public park, even if it's just like... wheeling your slave in a gimp suit around on a wagon or something. Involving other people in your kink without consent is a big ol' fucking nope from me. Kink shit stays in kink space, and I will fight god about that one.
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Let me just DIGEST ALL OF THAT FOR A FEW MOMENTS, thank you.]
2/2
Sincerely, Sasuke did not know sex could be so complex.
"Gimp suit"? He will not pursue that one.]
... I don't know that I would be interested in any of that. [A blowjob is the most sexually deviant act he has considered recently, next to the actual "sex" he would like to have with Cy, someday. And the toys Cy had gifted him? So, so lewd. Downright obscene.] Some of it sounds unsanitary. But no, I...
[Hm.]
I wouldn't want to expose myself like that publicly either. [He can hardly imagine holding someone's hand in visible line of sight.] How did anyone come up with these things?
no subject
（ he reaches for another little piece of celery off the crudités plate, chewing on it as he speaks: ）
I don't have a problem with public sex. I actually do monitoring in a dungeon — kink dungeon, not the other kind — back home, which basically means that I make sure things are safe and above board for the participants. I've had some good fun running free use scenes, for instance — setting a sub up to be used by other men or women while I oversee it. But that's still behind kinda-closed doors, you know?
（ but while they're on the topic he should probably say more about what he does like. ）
By the way — no pressure on my likes either. I know you're getting the hang of that by now, so I won't keep harping on it, but for my own peace of mind — happy to float these ideas your way, and never do them if they don't appeal to you. （ given the gravity of what they discussed not too long ago, he's sure sasuke will get why the extra step of clarity exists. ） I like doing things like spankings, flogging, general impact play. Getting someone so worked over they can't sit down after is pretty fucking nice — but the aftercare is absolutely critical there and I wouldn't ever scene without it. Knife play's a harder sell, needs a lot of trust on both sides. Tying people up, blindfolding them, edging, orgasm denial, all that kinda stuff. Fucking love using sex toys on a partner, which you might've figured out by now. Getting people to beg is... ah.
（ he shakes his head just a bit, and makes a breathy exhalation of sound. ）
Well, let's just say it turns my crank. Whether part of the scene is that they're begging me to stop but not safewording out, or they're begging me to — I don't know, fuck them, fill them, come inside them, let them come, it doesn't really matter to me. All forms equally welcome. But if you don't wanna get into any of that yet, or ever, that's fine too. Straight up vanilla sex is also pretty great, and I already know I'm gonna want to fuck you a thousand different ways without ever breaking out a set of fuzzy handcuffs, so the rest is up to you.
no subject
The rush of arousal is hot, vivid. Sitting on the blanket, Sasuke is aware of the sudden pulse between his own folded thighs, cock stirring, attention dovetailing from the meal altogether. He is aware that he wants... all of that, or at least he wants to try it. Pain, knives, obedience and control. Even the humiliating thought of begging. Under Cy's hands, anything feels possible—at least in that moment, in the blasé and confident way it's intoned.]
Cyram.
[Low and almost petulant, he hesitates on how to approach this sudden predicament of tunnel-visioned lust. His face is undeniably red.]
I'm finished eating.
no subject
Okay. My place or yours?
no subject
I don't care. [In a show of surprising initiative and physicality, this time Sasuke turns his head, seeking a full kiss, needy with the seal of hard pressure over Cy's mouth.] Your room is larger, but mine is cleaner.
[What about the food? ... The birds can eat it, for all he cares in that moment.]
no subject
We can do yours. I know you're a fastidious little bitch.
（ that word could be an insult from anyone else. from cy, it just sounds like sweetheart in another tongue. ）
Let me drop the food off — there's a place that takes donations for the low rank scrubs like us — and then I'll meet you there? Any particular thing on the list strike your fancy? Because if you're itching for me to stick anything up your ass I'm gonna send you back to your room to get yourself ready while I get the food sitch sorted.
no subject
The crass words don't feel like an insult, only livening another little flutter of interest in his stomach.]
Yes, I want to try it again. With your fingers and with the toy.
[Maybe he is getting ahead of himself—but the barrier of fear has eased, partly because Cy's treatment of him has not changed since that failed attempt. That foundation of reassurance has held.]
Send me back.
no subject
Send me back... hmm, missin' a l'il something-something. You can end that statement on 'please' or 'sir', I don't care which one.
（ just to be a little shit about it. ）
no subject
Send me back. Please, sir.
[Natural overachiever, unfortunately.]
no subject
Oh, he learns so quick.
（ he doesn't need to touch him to teleport him, but he does it anyway, leaning in and pressing another kiss to his mouth. ）
Remember to keep your eyes closed.
（ he warned him once, and not without reason. the void isn't exactly the safest place for humans. but now, he's confident enough that sasuke will obey him, and in a brief glimmer of that awful energy, he yeets the kid back to his room.
from there, it's just packing up the food. mindless busy work, done without really thinking about it, all his focus and attention already primed on sasuke. he's pretty sure the kid would have stripped down to nothing and all but jumped on the dildo the way he was all fired up there — but there's a warm, soft, certain confidence there too, that he'd be respectful enough of cy's preferences, temperament and triggers to have given himself a bit of grace about it, too. to have gone just slow enough as youthful impatience allows.
and he is thinking about it, still, when he transmats over to the food bank, and drops off the remainder of the platter — having carefully sorted out what was touched versus what was untouched. he chats a bit with the person tending the window, an easy, playful sort of conversation that comes so naturally to him, that's intended to build up sasuke's impatience with the time it's taking him to get there.
then it's a quick jaunt back to his room to grab that blanket still wrapped in its gift bag (which, for some ungodly reason, has a dick on it. really? at a store for bedding?) before he transmats into sasuke's small space. ）
cw nsfw now and 🙏 hopefully sasuke doesn't cockblock himself
ganbatte sasuke
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cw: (cy grab bag - war horrors/assault/trauma/suicide)
the walking content warning that is cy
🥲🥲🥲
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